


Things that didn't happen

by Comicfan



Series: Jason Todd/Artemis of Bana-Mighdall Challenge [3]
Category: Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics)
Genre: F/M, Friendship, Heart-to-Heart, Other, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, References to Depression, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-06
Updated: 2017-07-06
Packaged: 2018-11-23 03:04:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11394051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Comicfan/pseuds/Comicfan
Summary: Jason thought they needed to talk about things between them. Artemis took a different approach to the situation. Now he has more baggage to sort through.





	Things that didn't happen

**Author's Note:**

> Jason and Artemis are actually listed at the same height at 6' 0".

Jason knew he had enough baggage to single handedly fill up a plane. Family problems, food issues, death and resurrection trauma, etc. He was never that good at voicing any of it, he simply couldn't find the words. Not that anyone would really get all of it if he did. Bouts of depression were the norm when he kept everything bottled up. Having friends helped but Jason still couldn't bypass the barriers he had created. Not when he was plagued with thoughts and nightmares telling him that he was a freak. Did Jason really want the others to know how big of a monster he was? Did he want to confirm his worst fears by seeking answers?

All he had to do was remember Talia's horrified face when she saw him in the Lazarus Pit. When the daughter of Ra's Al Ghul looked that disturbed you knew you were an abomination. Every single day since then Jason Todd knew he didn't belong in the world of the living. There wasn't even much of a life for him to live for. A mission that would probably kill him again. A family that has never really accepted him outside of work. (As many "forgotten" invites to family events proved.)

Then there was his team and Jason tried not to think how long this incarnation would last. In Qurac he had assumed Artemis would return to her people after finally retrieving her bow. It still shocks him that she didn't but in the back of his mind Jason wondered when she'd change her mind. What if he can't keep Bizarro safe or Bruce decides Jason can't be trusted with the clone? If that and his recent injury weren't enough there was also the bath incident. Just being in the same room together was awkward for the Amazon and former boy wonder.

Jason had been bracing himself for the conversation ever since it happened. Trying to think of what he could say when they finally dealt with it. Dinner seemed nice enough on the surface with Diana being such a great hostess. If she knew what had occurred she gave no indication of it. Diana engaged in discussions with Jason and Bizarro seeming in to enjoy their quirks. Wonder Woman was one of the few heroes that didn't judge them. Something Jason appreciated especially since it helped put Bizarro at ease.

Artemis barely said anything during the meal, she seemed to be more bored than anything. He thought that she just had a lot on her mind and she'd want to go over the incident later. Jason was dreading it but it was probably best to clear the air between them. His expectations were dashed when Artemis went straight to bed afterward. She hadn't been around to see him for most of the next day and had informed Diana she would be in the city.

This confused Jason as he hadn't thought Artemis would get embarrassed over it. If anyone should be mortified it should be him as he hadn't been able to hide his...reaction. Jason did in fact want to make himself scarce but they had made a commitment to be a team. He wanted to make it work this time. 

The Amazon hadn't returned until near midnight and a sigh passed her lips when she saw him waiting for her. "You should be resting otherwise your injury won't heal properly."

Jason gave a careless shrug that hid his nervousness. "I'll rest after we sort things out. I figured we have a lot to talk about."

"Really?" She leaned against the wall next to her bedroom door. "And what could we possibly talk about?"

He blinked at her question not entirely sure what was going on. "Uh I thought we might need to talk about what happened. You know, in the bath."

"Nothing happened." Artemis stated looking like Jason was pestering her when all he wanted was to get this awkwardness over with. Was she actually trying to deny it?

"Well no, but the mood was kind of--"

"There was no "mood", Jason." She spoke to him like she was trying to explain something to a toddler for the thousandth time. For a moment all he could do was stare at her in disbelief.

"Look, I don't know why you're denying it. I assumed we could discuss this like adults. Clearly I was mistaken. Regardless you don't have to worry because I'm not interested in taking it further." Jason knew it would never work out between them.

Kori and him had been attracted to each other but ultimately decided not to go there. Remaining friends was more important than risking what they had. There weren't many people Jason could call his friend. His attraction to Artemis ran deeper but he could put that aside. It had never occurred to him that she might want him too until the bath incident. But he knew she'd come to her senses eventually.

When he gazed up he was met with cold emerald eyes. "You want to "discuss it like adults"? Fine. You were aroused by my body and wanted sexual gratification from me. There's nothing to "take further" as I assume you already--repeatedly--dealt with that appendage."

Although the heat of humiliation burned in his veins Jason still forced himself to press on. "That's not what I meant."

Artemis loomed in his space attempting to intimidate him. They were actually the same height but her heels gave her the advantage. She had previously tried to use it against him, as if Jason hadn't stared down worse. "You're a child. One with an overactive imagination."

For one horrible moment Jason almost believed her. That it had been something he had made up to help him cope with his often unbearable loneliness. For a moment he had wondered if her attraction to him had all been in his head. But he had been trained better than that no matter how much self doubt he possessed.

"Did you really think I wouldn't notice? Your breathing had become erratic. Your eyes were dilated and seeing as there wasn't a lighting problem what can you deduce?" No, Jason wasn't stupid no matter how many ignorant people claimed otherwise. "Also? The water wasn't cold which indicates excitement."

His implication was clear as she self consciously crossed her arms over her chest.

"My _appendage_ didn't specifically need you to affect it. Sometimes it just happens with that kind of physical contact. That doesn't mean I'm lusting after you. What's your excuse?" Knowing that it was pointless to try to have a mature conversation at this point he turned to leave. If he stayed he knew they'd both say something that couldn't be taken back.

That might have been a mistake if Artemis had chosen to pursue him. She might of if Diana hadn't appeared on the other side of the courtyard. The sound of Artemis' door slammed just as the princess spotted Jason. The smile she had froze then dropped when she noticed his expression. They silently walked towards each other meeting far enough away from Artemis' door to speak privately.

"I take it you had a disagreement with Artemis."

There was no point in lying to her so Jason just nodded. "Apparently after telling me that we should communicate with each other Artemis has suddenly changed her mind. Now she wants to avoid me."

"I have noticed a change in her behavior since yesterday. I tried to ask her about it but you know Artemis. She's stubborn and when she doesn't wish to speak on a subject no one can pry a word out of her." Diana gestured for him to walk with her around the estate.

"Oh she gave me several words."

"Ah yes, she does have a gift for a turn of a phrase." The look she bestowed was sympathetic although Jason detected a hint of affection. "Rest assured I've heard quite an earful when we've disagreed. May I ask what's changed? It seems odd that she would distance herself from you especially after trying to learn why you've been closed off recently."

"I never meant to hurt her." It was just so hard to say some of the things running around his head.

"I know, Jason." Her eyes were sad and her gentle grip grounded him when his thoughts started to drift. "You have no reason to feel guilty for what happened in the past or not being ready to speak about it. Just know that when you are ready you have friends and family that are willing to support you."

It sounded so easy and Jason appreciated the support she offered. He did think she was being naive to assume any of his family outside maybe Tim and Alfred would be there for him. How many times had he overheard them blaming him for his own death before he had revealed himself as Red Hood? Claiming he wasn't good enough and that he had "challenged" Joker? Pushing those poisonous thoughts away he gave Diana a grateful smile. "Thanks."

"Artemis may be headstrong but she's extremely loyal. I'm certain that whatever occurred wouldn't diminish the bond you have with her." Passing through an ornate archway Diana brought them to the entrance of the forest.

"I wish I could be as sure. I'm still trying to make sense out of it all."

"I see. Then you don't know why she's upset?" Diana sat on a fallen tree and after a moment of hesitation he followed her example.

"I...I think I might have embarrassed her. Maybe. I'm embarrassed but I figured we could at least try to get pass it." Jason really didn't want to explain all the details to Wonder Woman.

There was a pause when neither attempted to add anything else. Then realization crossed her face and Diana clear her throat. "I seem to recall Artemis had bathed around the same time you were soaking. Did she enter the main bathing chamber while you were there?"

His face it seemed was answer enough for her. Diana's brow furrowed as she thought on it a little longer.

"Jason, I'm sorry but I don't understand how that could embarrass Artemis."

"It didn't. She thought I was overreacting and...uh...entered the pool." Why was he saying so much? He had to shut up before he made things worse.

"...I can see how that would be awkward for you. Amazons don't really have the same--"

"Yeah, I got that memo." If he didn't want to say anything more he should leave. Being around Diana compelled people to be honest. Then again how often had he confided in anyone? Artemis certainly wasn't willing to talk with him."She was so sad though, because she felt like I was pushing her away. I'm trying not to do that anymore. I just...I felt bad for hurting her..."

She waited patiently for him to continue while Jason floundered for a way to say what happen without actually saying it. 

"I guess it took me by surprise, you know. I, uh, kind of forgot where we were and how inappropriate it was."

_Why can't I shut up? Damn it I'm babbling again !_

A deer, and actual deer butted the princess with its head and she petted it before it ran off.

_To think I used to be under the impression that only happened in Disney movies._

"There's nothing inappropriate about being concerned for her. I do understand how growing up in a different environment made you feel uncomfortable about sharing such a seemingly intimate setting. I can't say for sure if Artemis truly appreciates your cultural differences as it's a normal social place for Amazons." Diana was so kind to everyone and Jason wished she had been around more when he was Robin. Maybe things would have been different if she was.

"We sort of...touched." He averted his eyes not wanting to see her expression. "Realizing it made things...weird."

"How so?" Her arm wrapped around her shoulders just like it had when he was Robin and Batman had been overbearing. "I can see how the nudity and causal touching could bother you. Privacy can be a sacred thing. I still don't know what could get Artemis to this state. She seemed so determined to be a good friend and see you through hard times."

Jason shrugged partly because he didn't really know and partially because he didn't want to tell her certain details.

_Not to mention Artemis would like kill me in my sleep if I tell Diana we were both turned on._

"I suppose we both will have to wait to speak with her. Don't worry I'll be tactful when I approach her again." 

"No offense Diana but I'd prefer it if you didn't. Maybe we should just let it go." He tried to a nonchalant tone he had heard Dick use to sound confident. "I'm sure she'll get over it."

"Perhaps though it might take her awhile depending on what caused her such distress. Let me know if you change your mind." She gracefully rose to her feet and kissed him on the forehead like she used to do when he was a small sidekick. "Get some rest Jason. Spent tomorrow in your room to give yourself time to heal."

"If you insist I guess I have to." Jason watched Diana as she walked back to the estate.

She always did know how to make someone feel better even if the situation was hopeless. He idly picked at the tree bark on the log he sat on for some time. At some point he'd get up even if he wanted to linger a bit longer in the secluded spot Diana had taken him to. It felt peaceful there and he hadn't felt true peace in some time.

_I don't know why I'm making a big deal about this. It would never work out between us. So Artemis might have wanted me for a moment...well everyone has lapses in judgement. Maybe I was just convenient._

A bitter chuckle escaped him ruining his previously pleasant haven. 

_Convenient. Right after "mistake" I guess that sums me up pretty well. At least Artemis came to her senses. I must have looked pathetic going to her like that instead of leaving it alone. I--_

Jason hissed as splinters embedded themselves into his hand. His careless swipes at the wood drove one piece underneath his fingernail. The familiar pain brought a memory to the forefront of his mind.

_Keep it together, Jason._

Unable to shake it off he tumbled off the log as his feet buckled when he tried to move forward. The soil was still damp under fallen tree and the smell of decay--

_There wasn't much air. He needed to get out. Pure instinct was in charge not his mind. There was no mind just the need. Survive. Scratching, metal scrapping, nails breaking, broken bits of wood stabbing him, then fresh air..._

By the time Jason regained his sense of surroundings the sky was starting to lighten. His body shook on it's own accord and he guessed the sound of ragged breathing was him too. The early mourning chill strengthened his shivers and the blanket around him tightened. It was then Jason noticed he was being moved and the "blanket" was actually a cape.

"Biz...arro...?" His hated how weak he sounded and the concern he saw etched on Bizarro's face.

"Red Him rest, you safe now." Carrying Jason one handed Bizarro opened the door to the guest bedroom that had been given to Jason. It was amazing to note the amount of care the clone gave especially if one remembered how rough he had once been. "Did Red Him have more nightmares?"

"Nightmares?"

Bizarro's tongue flicked out to the corner of his mouth as he carefully unlaced Jason's boots. He gently removed the jacket then his shirt before replacing them with an oversized blue shirt. It took a few seconds longer than it normally would to realize it was part of Bizarro's own causal wear. Jason felt like he was moving too slow and found it hard to think properly. Not being as bulky or large (though Jason was usually considered pretty tall at 6"0') he suspected the shirt would look like a nightgown on him. The image brought a faint smile on his face for no real reason.

"Yes, Red Him's heart beats fast and wakes up yelling. Me not know what to do then or when it happens in day." The clone apologised as he plucked out the bits of wood and cleaned the wounds like he had previously seen Jason do. He then gestured to the pants Jason wore that were damp from the mourning dew. "Need me to help?"

Jason fumbled with the zipper but he felt too feeble to get his fingers to cooperate. "Just leave them on."

Bizarro gave a disapproving shake of his head that would have done Alfred proud. "Need to be comfy and clothes wet."

Not wanting Bizarro to accidentally rip them or call one of the Amazons for help Jason struggled with the zipper before getting them down far enough. The effort exhausted him and he got a pat of encouragement that was a tad too strong for his troubles.

"You said it happens during the day?" He had to know how much Bizarro knew about his PTSD.

"When Red Him is awake like in the graveyard." 

...Right, he had been half buried alive before digging himself up, shooting the bastard and throwing up. He hadn't come around until hours later and thought Bizarro hadn't known what had happened. It was amazing that he hadn't killed the man responsible but his aim had been off. Jason hadn't wanted Bizarro to see him like this much less know about it.

"It okay."

It really wasn't, shame filled him because no one was supposed to know. Or at the very least see him at his weakest. Jason had come so far and now it felt like none of his progress mattered.

"Am there to keep him safe. We protect each other." Bizarro ruffled his hair damp and tucked him in.

"Yeah, I guess we do." Eyes feeling heavy Jason allowed himself to fall asleep knowing his big buddy would be there when he woke.

**Author's Note:**

> While these fics do deal with Jason being attracted to Artemis I wanted to have him make it clear that sometimes guys just get excited. That it doesn't mean they want to have sex with the other person. Jason couldn't control it and even if he has feelings for Artemis that doesn't mean he would have acted on it. He didn't like her implications to the contrary that make it sound like he only cares about her physically and/or is focused on sex.
> 
> It's been mentioned that Diana can be persuasive in comics and that she has a talent for getting the truth without using the lasso. I don't think this implies she's forcing control over people so much as she's a good diplomat and someone you feel comfortable talking to.
> 
> Not too much interaction with Jason and Artemis but I wanted to have more Diana and Bizarro.
> 
> Kori and Jason were hinted at being somewhat attracted to each other but it's canon that they never did anything and decided to just be friends.


End file.
